Luckily, Sufferlandria is a virtual world. If it was real, I imagine the minions would be waiting for you at the arrivals gate wielding broadswords and nun chucks.
Yesterday afternoon, the wind was blowing so I decided to jump on the trainer in the SufferCell® and have a crack at Blender. I had made one previous attempt, but the video had stopped at about the 50 minute mark due to my WiFi chucking a wobbly. Another lesson learned at the school of hard knocks. I transferred all the Sufferfest videos to my local drive on the laptop and hoped that would help.
Blender is a full 100 minutes on the trainer. Having never done more than an hour, I was in for a shock.
I was well prepared. Three bottles of water, one of Gatorade and a couple of Gels. Fan on medium and towel within arms reach. It is go time.
As is the norm, you are eased into the hurt. There are intervals either just below or just above your FTP. Before too long your heart rate is going up and the legs are feeling the burn.
You can see from the graph here, trainer road makes it very easy to know if you are having a good go or taking it easy. I find it helps me greatly. With out it, I could take it easy and no one would ever know. With the graph, there is no place to hide. One thing that TrainerRoad doesn’t account for is the more evil aspect of Sufferfest videos. Those times when the minions demand more than the normal effort. You can see it on the graph where there are big spikes above the line. At one point you are in a break, swapping off with another rider. I try and stay true to the requests from the video. I shouldn’t, it bloody hurts.
As I approached the hour mark, I was back to being a human sprinkler. A pool of sweat was forming beneath me. The Gatorade was gone. I had one and a bit bottles of water left and no Gels. And things were about to turn ugly.
Blender was living up to its name. In blocks of six intervals, the ante was upped. I was starting to go into that SufferTimeWarp thing. Sweat was stinging my eyes. The first block hurt. The second even more. The third block was asking me to put out more power than was comfortable. Angry with the lack of sympathy from the minions, I stomped out the last interval and somehow hit 800W at one point.
That ding that lets you know you can ease of was the sweetest sound in the world. My heart was trying to escape my chest via my throat. My legs felt about as useful as Kermit’s at that point.
I wasn’t finished though. There was still 20 minutes of misery left, with three intervals at FTP. I am not sure what happened, but each of those three intervals I increased my power as the interval went on. I think my mind thought the quicker I pedaled the sooner I would get home. Stupid mind! As usual, the minions make you suffer even longer on the last interval. Stupid minions.
I finally finished. The long warm down helped convince my heart to forget any plans it had to move out. TrainerRoad saved the session and I slowly crawled off the bike.
Blender had lived up to its name and all the horror stories I had heard on the interwebs. Not as intense as the madness that is Revolver, but it is such a long time to be on a trainer.
So, another one that I can say I have finished.