The Anthony Tan Song

Those lucky Aussies like myself, who are being spoilt by the most excellent coverage this year on SBS, will know on Anthony “Tanman” Tan.

It struck me the other night when he was being interviewed by Mike Tomalaris, Mr Mike Tomalaris, that the Tanman has a very unique face. So unique, I have rejigged the words of a song to celebrate the fact. The words to which should be sung to the tune of the song in the video below.

On ya Tanman!

His hair is black as coal, his lips over sized
His hands look real old, he’s got Uma Thurman eyes
He’ll turn the podium girls on, they won’t have to think twice
He’s like to turn on a show, he’s got Uma Thurman eyes

And he’ll probe you, he’ll disrobe you
All the better just to please you
He’s precocious, and he knows just
What it takes to make a pro blush
He’s got Culbert’s muppet thighs, he’s got Uma Thurman eyes

He’ll let you hear his words, as he holds the mike tight
He’ll slip a not so sly bird, he’s got Uma Thurman eyes
He’ll give a subtle clue, he’ll always try to be nice
Until you speak some poo, he’s got Uma Thurman’s eyes

He’ll surprise you, when he shows you
How he and Mike Tomalaris like to speak blue
He’s ferocious and he knows just
What it takes to make a pro blush
All the pros like to make him cry, he’s got Uma Thurman eyes

And he’ll probe you, he’ll disrobe you
All the better just to please you
He’s precocious, and he knows just
What it takes to make a pro blush
He’s got Culbert’s muppet thighs and, he’s got Uma Thurman eyes